Recently I came across an essay by 20th Century fashion illustrator Polly Francis, the first of a three part series originally written for the Washington Post. Polly writes about her experiences of life as a nonagenarian:
“A new set of faculties seems to be coming into operation. I seem to be awakening to a larger world of wonderment—to catch little glimpses of the immensity and diversity of creation. More than at any other time in my life, I seem to be aware of the beauties of our spinning planet and the sky above. And now I have the time to enjoy them. I feel that old age sharpens our awareness.”
by Delia Margaret Tighe Francis (1884-1978), written at age 91 in “The Autumn of My Life,” Songs of Experience, Ballantine Books, 1991
Reading Polly’s words brought to mind the research of Swedish gerontologist Lars Tornstam which resulted in his theory of gerotranscendence. I have mentioned Tornstam’s work in earlier posts. Briefly, his idea is that some of the very old are able to reach a stage of psychological development previously unidentified in the literature. This stage is characterized by a different relationship to time, a sense of wonder at the mysteries of life, a change in relationships to self, others and the material world, and, as Polly relates above, the discovery of a new joy in nature and everyday events. Paula Span’s post “Aging’s Misunderstood Virtues” in The NY Times New Old Age blog explores Tornstam’s work.
I look forward to the time when I might find myself at this transcendent stage of life. And I wonder how it happens that we grow out of our busy concerns with the outer world to enter the rich and satisfying inner life that Tornstam describes.
I see a hint in Carl Jung’s writings in the Red Book. He relates a vision that came to him during a very intense period of exploration of his own inner world. He says, “If I accept death, then my tree greens….my buds break open.” He is expressing one of those paradoxes that are typical of Jungian thought. But putting it together with Tornstam’s ideas, I think I might understand something of what he means.
One of the greatest developmental tasks facing very old people is to accept death. I believe that Jung is telling us that the portal to gerotranscendence is through engaging with our feelings and fears about our own mortality. If we can do this we may discover a sense of peace with the inevitability of our own demise. As he says in the Red Book, “Joy in the smallest things comes to you only when you have accepted death … Therefore, I behold death, since it teaches me how to live.”
Jung used a technique that he called active imagination to embrace the horrors that death held for him. Others have achieved a state similar to gerotranscendence at a younger age according to Tornstam through an encounter with a serious life trauma or a near death experience. The higher states of consciousness experienced by advanced meditators may be akin to gerotranscendence as well. Could we call all of it enlightenment?
While I am not yet old enough to feel very strongly the cold breath of my own mortality, my nightly visits with my dream crocodile often brings feelings about death into my consciousness. I don’t know where this practice will take me, but I hope at least to find that when it is time to face my own death I will be a bit more prepared than I might otherwise have been.
The journey inward serves many purposes in the final stage of life. It is seen in other significant transitions like adolescence where internal work is critical to making the a successful passage. But it also is necessary for the life review process, that involuntary retrospective of a the life led, what it means, and how it will be remembered. This is a big job that requires retrieval, reconsideration, and (hopefully) repair. In that regard, the detachment of older adults is not only normal, but necessary. As with adolescents, giving our elders “space” to work through their tasks is essential. So is staying close, the adult child version of being on call. Our elders need both…
We appreciate your insights on old age and particularly the life review. You are so right about the support and understanding that elders need to find the time and space to do this important inner work–so much more fulfilling than bingo.