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By Carol February 19th, 2012
I’ve been poking around the blog this week pulling out a few posts to use as a basis for a submission to a local writing contest. In the process I came across a post that I wrote about a year after Dad’s death. I like it so much that I think it’s worth re-posting. So here it is
Exploring the Gifts of Caregiving
Caregiving can be hard. Really, really hard. As Bill has said, it can feel a lot like rolling a boulder up a steep hill only to have it plunge back down to the bottom over and over again. I have also heard caregivers describe the job as an endless roller coaster ride or a long slog through a muddy marsh in the rain.
Part of what makes caregiving so challenging is …
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By Carol February 7th, 2012
We can solve just about any problem if we talk about it together
I heard myself saying this to Bill the other day after we had resolved a potentially serious malware attack on our computer. As I think of it, this seems to be one of the great truths of our relationship. Recently our challenges as a couple have gone a bit deeper than a computer glitch. Retirement is a momentous experience in the life of anyone who has worked almost every day of their adult life as Bill has. We both knew it would be a big adjustment but I don’t think anyone can know exactly how retirement going to impact them until it happens.
For a while things went pretty smoothly between us. Bill got a part time job, we adjusted our …
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By Bill November 9th, 2011
Sunday Carol and I went to the opera. The opera was Faust by Charles Gounod, sung in French. What does an opera have to do with caregiving? In this case, there is quite a lot. If you don’t know the old German legend, the subject of many works, Faust, old, accomplished, but bored with life sells his soul to the devil for youth and knowledge.
In Gounod’s version, he is sick, isolated, and lonely as well. He regains youth and vigor from Satan, seduces the girl, kills her brother in a swordfight, the girl gets pregnant, Faust abandons her, she goes crazy and kills the baby. Sentenced to death for the murder, Faust, realizing he still loves her, tries to persuade her to escape with him, but she is too crazy. She prays fervently, achieves …
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By Bill October 27th, 2011
The New Yorker is well known for its liberal take on most issues. This cartoon which ran in the October 24 issue is a notable exception. I guess making fun of older women drivers is still politically correct.
If you drove anywhere today, you probably encountered a significant number of older drivers with no problem and were not aware they were older. Yes, there are older drivers who do not do very well behind the wheel. However, as you were driving, you encountered other younger drivers who should not be behind the wheel while talking on the phone, with a few too many drinks, a problem with rage, or just very sleepy.
Why didn’t the cartoon have a Native American, an African American, an Asian, or a white male? Ageism. It permeates …
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By Carol October 18th, 2011
A few days ago Bill and I attended a lecture sponsored by our local aging in place Village, Washington Park Cares. Jennie Creasey from Jewish Family Services in Denver spoke on Reframing Independence as We Age. We discussed the paradoxical idea that asking for help is a key to maintaining independence.
Many of us, caregivers and elders alike, are strangely reluctant to reach out for the kind of help that the Village volunteers across the country provide, such as rides or help in the garden and around the house. The video below courtesy of the Columbia School of Journalism Brave Old World project points out that those who ask for help are providing a service too by giving helpers an opportunity to enrich their own lives through helping.
I had a chance to experience …
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