Inside Aging Parent Care

At the End of Caregiving

By Carol January 24th, 2012

For every caregiver, the day will arrive when caregiving comes to an end. Most of us can’t know when that day will come. Because of this, caregiving often seems endless, but it is not.

Some of us are able to accept that the end is coming sooner or later. The couple in this video are planning for the time when he will be gone, and she will be alone. Senior co-housing is one option for companionship and support for the spouse that is left behind.

Weighing the Options from Our Future Selves on Vimeo.

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Technorati Tags: afraid, aging in place, Brave Old World, caregiver mental health, caregiver needs, caregiver stress, co-housing, coping with death, Elder Spirit, end of life, end of life decisions, family caregiver, pain of caregiving, Paula Span. Columbia University School of Journalism

Revisiting the Crocodile: A Caregiver Sums Up

By Carol July 12th, 2011

You never know how a death is going to take you until it happens. Even so, I think it is normal to try to prepare by looking ahead–especially during a long good-bye like my father’s.

We can find so much information on grief and mourning that researching the subject almost gets in the way. After my mother’s death I had a particularly hard time getting past what I’d learned I “should” feel to what I actually was feeling. In the early days after Dad died, I felt stunned. Encountering Death and losing Dad left me disoriented and at loose ends.

I needed structure and some way to understand my life now, post caregiving and orphaned. Three weeks after Dad died, I had this helpful dream: I walk down a hill to the edge of …

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Libraries are for Caregivers

By Bill June 8th, 2011

Caregiving Information

Monday evening I attended a public meeting at one of Denver’s branch libraries concerning proposed budget cuts for our library system. The great recession has hurt Denver’s sales tax revenue, forcing budget cuts for all City operations for the last three years. The library has reduced hours at all its branches, with most branches open only four days per week with open hours also reduced.

This year’s budget has cuts continuing, resulting in the library’s operations falling below minimum standards. There are several options to deal with the reductions, including closing several branch libraries. The most appealing option is for the voters approving creating a special library district with a property tax mill levy amounting to about $60.00 per year for a $200,000 home. This would provide a more stable funding …

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Signposts on the Caregiver’s Journey

By Carol May 24th, 2011

The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making by Viki Kind

At the same time we were preparing to host a family meeting to begin discussing end of life issues, I was reading Viki Kind’s practical and enlightening book The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making. This is a book that should be on every caregiver’s shelf or, even better, in every caregiver’s handbag or briefcase. It is one of those works that will help caregivers feel just a bit less alone and quite a bit more confident of the path at some of the toughest times on the journey.

But don’t wait until the road gets rough to read it.

Take a look at Viki’s book before deciding on care arrangements or filing out living wills and other legal forms. Viki covers the pros …

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Caregivers Consider–Who will Care for Us?

By Carol May 17th, 2011

As Dad looked ahead to the end of his life, he was very clear about some of his wishes. He definitely wanted to be cremated and to have his ashes scattered at sea. He was less clear about how much medical intervention he wanted and how he wanted to die. Years ago he made a living will expressly forbidding extraordinary measures. In his last years he frequently asserted that he planned to live to be “at least” 100 thus avoiding serious discussions about palliative care or hospice until the very end. As his caregiver and without his input, I became overwhelmed as death approached, unnamed and unacknowledged.

If l learned anything from Dad’s death, it is that the plain talk about end of life issues cannot begin too soon. And, it isn’t enough to …

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At the End of Caregiving

Revisiting the Crocodile: A Caregiver Sums Up

Libraries are for Caregivers

Signposts on the Caregiver’s Journey

Caregivers Consider–Who will Care for Us?

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