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By Carol November 20th, 2011
My dad, Frank, died over a year ago at the age of 91. When he finally came to live in Denver two years before his death, I thought I would be able to help him have a better life, a happier old age. It turned out that the real job was to support him while he moved closer and closer to death.
As the days of his life grew shorter, my confusion multiplied. As much I knew he would die one day, I was caught up in Dad’s insistence that he would live to be “at least” 100. I think it seemed easier to accept this idea than to understand that death was creeping nearer to us with every passing day.
The last days and weeks of Dad’s life were very difficult for all …
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By Bill November 3rd, 2011
Independence Monument
Respite care for caregivers is a broad definition that boils down to “Give me a break!” Caregivers do direct care for their elder, cook, clean, run errands, provide transportation,entertain, deal with the medical system, agonize over finances, and a myriad of other tasks. This is more than a 24/7 job. It is all-consuming. The caregiver has to get away at times to relax, recharge, enjoy something, fight with the siblings, and collapse. That is respite.
Judi wrote a post about the new VA respite care program. It seems the VA is a pioneer in providing low cost respite care for caregivers. The private sector also has a broad range of respite care programs, but at a significant cost. Most communities have senior day care programs.
That is about it. Most caregivers, …
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By Bill September 1st, 2011
I am writing fairly brief posts because I am a bit busy caregiving. My wife Carol is recovering nicely from surgery and her son Steve will have surgery Friday. I am caregiver for both.
This story ran in Sunday’s Denver Post newspaper. It is a story about the tragedy of Alzheimer’s and the enduring magic of love. Do read it all. I would insert it here, but copyright laws prevent my doing so.
Alzheimer's
The story is one of someone slowly being robbed of her mind, and her husband’s witness to her decline. She always recognized him, and some elements of her personality stayed with her. This is similar to what happened to Frank and Audrey, Carol’s parents. Frank had significant memory loss, but his personality was intact until he died of other …
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By Judi July 24th, 2011
If the video will not play, please click on the link below:
Palliative Care-USA Today Report
Palliative care is a philosophy of care—a holistic, systematic approach to treating physical symptoms of people with life-limiting illnesses. The real truth is that Palliative care focuses on quality of life as defined by the individual.
The interdisciplinary Palliative care team usually includes a nurse practitioner, a chaplain, a social worker and a psychologist. All work with the physicians and specialists treating the patient. Other professionals are also called upon. They may include a pharmacist, a dietitian, physical and occupational therapists, trained volunteers and a bereavement counselor.
“Our responsibility as caregivers is to make people better when we can and to relieve their suffering when we can’t”, according to Dr. John Goodill, director of pain management …
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By Carol July 12th, 2011
You never know how a death is going to take you until it happens. Even so, I think it is normal to try to prepare by looking ahead–especially during a long good-bye like my father’s.
We can find so much information on grief and mourning that researching the subject almost gets in the way. After my mother’s death I had a particularly hard time getting past what I’d learned I “should” feel to what I actually was feeling. In the early days after Dad died, I felt stunned. Encountering Death and losing Dad left me disoriented and at loose ends.
I needed structure and some way to understand my life now, post caregiving and orphaned. Three weeks after Dad died, I had this helpful dream: I walk down a hill to the edge of …
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